6 quick listening tips.

Every family has certain rules about what is accepted when it comes to the spoken word especially where our kids are concerned. There are the obvious ones like no swearing, no calling each other names and no yelling at the goldfish (my son thinks they’re deaf because they won’t do as they’re told). But, my boys set a rule for me too recently….

Seems I’ve been banned from using the word “mm-huh”. You know, it’s what we say when we’re not really paying attention but we don’t want them to know. Not sure if it’s officially a word but it definitely should be because I’m quite sure every mother would uses it a dozen times a day.

At first I thought “Jeez, give me a break, can’t I even pretend every now and then?” But then I was reminded of the importance of really listening to our kids when they’re young no matter how mind numbingly boring the topic is. Then, when they’re older they’ll just assume we’ll listen and actually want to talk to us.

So now I encourage my boys to pull me up when I’m tuned out. It reminds me to at least consider whether what I’m doing is really more important than the impression I’m giving them. If it is I explain and ask them to wait because I really do want to see the latest footy card addition or else I stop and give my undivided attention. Usually only takes a minute or two.

Here are some more little suggestions that you may be able to easily slip in to your daily routine to encourage their communication skills and help us to listen.

1.          Ask them a specific question about their day. Then listen and make positive comment.

2.          At dinner time take it in turns to choose a dinner time topic of conversation.

3.          Every now and then ask for some one-on-one lounge time for a quick chat.

4.          When you talk make eye contact.

5.          If you can see its extra important make the time to sit down with them and talk it through.

6.          Use driving time to ask questions you might not otherwise.

I expect your life is as busy as mine on any given day but surely we can fit this in. It is important and it doesn’t take much. We just need reminding sometimes.

Often, if you really listen hard, you can hear so much more than is actually being said. Author Unknown.